It's just over 24 hours since we did everything except win the Cricket World Cup.
I needed that time to process....plus catch-up on sleep!
Now we're living through the aftermath.
The in-depth breakdown of the what-if's.
The unfairness of some rules and processes.
Questions, questions, questions!
It will take a little time to calm itself.
But even in this raw state, what are a couple of learning's to takeaway, especially for our youth who may be seeing and hearing some negative adult commentary, dare I even say, tantrum type behaviour?
Here's a couple of points to remember. Share them with the children or sulking adults in your life.
Your best doesn't guarantee victory.
Unless you have the lifetime Midas-Touch, get comfortable and accepting of loss. Even when you've trained hard, practiced diligently and have nothing else left to give, yeah you'll still lose! It happens regularly across everything in life. But good news! You will experience some pretty sweet wins as well. That's what you sign-up for when you get involved in competition.
Moaning on social media isn't going to change the result.
Yes, these are the times of reliving, rehashing and complaining to anyone who'll listen online, but it's done. Continually posting about the unfairness etc. etc. just starts looking oddly bitter and a little sad.
How lucky were we to experience that moment.
Yes losing sucks, but seriously how lucky were we to witness that game full-stop?
T E A M
As individuals, many of the Black Cap players may not be considered the "best" in the world in their positions, but this team have continually provided us all a proper demonstration of being gritty, mentally stubborn and relentless in their approach, especially under pressure. Many of us want individual glory, yet a team sport is about the collective. Kane and the boys have shown this better than any team I've seen in sometime. This lesson needs to be given to every youngster (and many adults!).
Maintain the support. Be at the next match.
No matter if it's the Black Caps or the local sport team, eat the loss and be at the next game, supporting harder than ever. You can bet I'll be at the next match when the English team tour here in November.
Everything should be put into perspective.
If nothing else, get perspective. Yes it would have been great to win our first World Cup. Yes the way we lost was questionable. But put this game of cricket into wider perspective. There are far more important and truly "heart-breaking" things taking place in the world, that puts this one moment into it's true place.
Bloody well done to our BlackCaps. What a TEAM they are.
Congratulations (big gulp and teeth-grit) to the English.
So, who's up for some Netball World Cup moments?
I've just had the opportunity to bare witness to one of the good old institutions of the school experience.
The School Play.
Watching a bunch of 6 & 7 year olds recite learnt lines, tread the boards, smile, giggle and generally enjoy the experience of performing for their audience, is a bloody nice reminder.
Their fun is simple; yet so good to watch.
They feel nervous; yet with a little encouragement they just get on with it.
They learn a lot of lessons that aren't even known to them yet.
Simplicity is still freely present. Please hold onto that!
As we develop through childhood and into adults, something quite often happens to the majority of us.
We get rained in by societal expectations.
We develop tendencies that aren't always personally helpful.
We quite often lose the ability to have simple fun.
We worry what others think about us. We just worry too much.
We get caught up trying to keep up with the Jones's. Want more, need more. Sheesh!
We need to revert back to our younger children's mindsets more often.
Keep things simple, less complicated and enjoy, just enjoying ourselves.
The over-complication we develop and then live in, is now showing up in the "stats" we're seeing and hearing about everyday in the media, and the unfortunate outcomes they can have.
Thanks for the reminder little actors!
However, one thing that hasn't changed significantly, and seems to have been the status quo for too long, is the way in which we all consider, and ultimately deal with our own ongoing mental health and mindset. In other words, how we individually maintain our mental state on a day-to-day basis.
Sure, there's been attempts in recent times to encourage more personal action around this (e.g. the use of mindfulness, including introducing variations of these with children in the school setting, reminders to check in and talk more regularly with mates / friends / family, and the benefits of keeping physically active.
Why is this?
There's more than likely been research done, or numerous government strategy jaw-fest's completed to look into this, but I feel it comes down to one historical reason. We've never known any better.
These days, most people are aware of and understand the need to keep physically active; no matter if that's through prescribed exercise, sport or recreation. However, we often glaze over or don't appreciate that our mental health needs a similar preventative and maintenance approach; above and beyond just keeping active.
The lingering "she'll be right" attitude and mindset still remains for many - until it isn't all right. You only have to look at our dire suicide rate, and in particular, some of the industries or parts of society who are contributing to this e.g. the farming and building sectors (link & link). This old school, "toughen-up" mentality really has run it's course, but educating society about the need, and life-long benefits of personally taking care of our brain health, every single day, isn't something that has been standard or normal for many of us. It's possibly seen as a bit "weird" or outside the box. This shift requires wide understanding and willingness, and I'm not sure if the vast majority are in this space yet, even though the benefits of doing so are immense.
Can this be improved or changed?
Of course, but there's no quick-fix solution, and will likely rely on a complete generational switch in thinking.
The Performance Instigator is trying to help drive this model of personal mental-health maintenance responsibility, by providing his Mental Performance Workout™ (link here).
This personalised workout is available for youth through to adults, and focuses on developing an individuals mental / mindset skills and abilities for specific "performance" situations, or to just help with our daily cognitive health.
Are we ready for a workout that solely focuses on the top 2 inches? The jury is out. But by introducing and encouraging such mental approaches with our youth, along with finding those gems in society, who are willing to take legitimate steps to look after themselves in a well-rounded way, I remain optimistically hopeful.
Only time will tell, but I hope for open-minds and some courageous, willing individuals to take the lead, and role-model a more personally responsible, mental health care approach.
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It's that time of year again....cross country day has arrived at my children's primary school, and the air is heavy with a combination of pent-up excitement, the odd bit of chest-beating, and the expected amount of excuses...and that's only from the parents.
There were some rumblings in the media a while back, in regards to how some schools were looking at this annual running event, and ways to update it for the current climate. In other words, watering down the raro. It's been found that some children (and probably proportionally, many parents) don't like it. Poor little darlings.
Ideas for updating it included turning it into a ninja-warrior type obstacle course, with ropes, water holes, tire walls etc. All well and good, until rope-burn, fear of drowning or a couple of cases of rubber allergy come up, and it'll be time for another update. It's circular in it's complexity.
Whether you're a fan or not, this is just a further example of the minority needing to be catered to over the majority. At it's core, the school cross-country is a raw, basic and straight-forward activity. It's not supposed to be all flashing lights and a total captivation of the imagination; because not everything has to, or should be.
You run, you sweat, you get tired, you fall behind (for most anyway!), but you keep going and you finish. Where you place is insignificant; unless you've got wider cross-country ambitions, but most don't.
So, here's a couple of simple tips to help get your child to the start line - even if it's still with a dropped lip!
We've got to be preparing them for the inevitable challenges they will face in life, not always sugarcoating or protecting them, in some vain attempt to shield a little difficulty.
The Performance Instigator has recently developed The Courageous Competitor Initiative, which is perfect to address some of the concerns young people have about competing, not just in sport, but in a variety of settings across life.
Find out more here - performanceinstigator.com/courageouscompetitor
To help develop and take their mental and mindset ability to the next level, The Mental Performance Workout™ is recommended.
Check out more info here - performanceinstigator.com/youth-mpw-offer